As the landscape of the world, our country, and education continues to change, I am constantly reflecting on what is best for our students and staff. Recently, I received some confirmation and a reminder of what is truly important. I was looking through a memory book created after my dad’s passing. Many people left incredible and touching reflections about the wonderful man my dad was and the kindness, care, and compassion that he showed to everyone.
My dad was a family doctor, and relationships were of great importance to him. At the core of his practice was an unmatched love and care for each and every one of his patients. This was in all areas of his life: he treated people with dignity. He never met a stranger and treated everyone the same, regardless of title. I always remember my dad telling me that it is important to treat everyone the same, from the president of the hospital to the third-shift custodian. They were all of value to the success of the organization. As I wrote in his obituary, my dad was “an angel on earth.“ I am forever grateful that my brothers and I got to witness servant leadership, kindness, fun, and joy on a daily basis from him.
As I read the reflections about my dad, I came across the following passage that embodied his incredible kindness and focus on relationships.
“Dr. Landgraf was an amazing man. He delivered my two older children who are now 26 and 24. I worked with him at CMH and while there, he told me that someone called him about a patient who was anxious in the middle of the night. He would ask them,”Well have you tried holding her hand, or bringing her a warm blanket or giving her a hug or some reassurance that everything was going to be alright?” Can’t you just picture [your dad] saying that? What a kind, loving man.”
Wow! Stories like this one are prevalent by all who knew him. This particular excerpt really made me think about the tremendous impact we can have on each other when we approach every interaction with our students, colleagues, and parents with care and compassion. 
My dad’s examples have guided me in my life and my educational career. I constantly am reminded that we, as educators, are in the relationship business. Before we can expect any results from students academically we need to connect with students in a positive way and build a level of trust. It truly is relationships before rigor. I try to identify those qualities which will help our students become the best versions of themselves and live lives of passion and purpose.
The connections my dad made with his patients, his family, friends, and colleagues are a reminder of what is most important. Relationships are first and foremost the most critical element in any successful organization, especially schools. Every member of the school community needs to feel valued and cared for. Each and every student needs to feel love. When they do, we are able to push our students in the right direction. We are better equipped to create an environment where students are not afraid to fail and know that we are there to help them grow and to pick them up if needed.
I want to extend an invitation for you to share with me stories of how individuals have inspired you and how you transfer these lessons to your school community. As our times continue to feel more contentious and wrought with negativity, it is important for us to share stories of kindness, to uplift others, and to help others find their true, authentic, and passionate selves. The ripple effect of positivity can be contagious.
Please email your stories to mlandgraf@canterburyschool.org. I would like to weave these stories into future reflections. I look forward to trying to create a ripple of positivity to help us stay a little calmer and more hopeful during these times.
Thanks to all of you for devoting your lives to education and to changing other lives for the better.
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Mike Landgraf is so grateful for the opportunity to contribute to gcLi’s Leadership Blog, having had an amazing experience at the Leadership Lab a number of years ago. He’s in his 23rd year as an educator. He is blessed with a wonderful wife, Stephanie, and two amazing boys, Jack and Sam. Mike and his family love traveling, going to sporting events, hanging by the campfire, and laughing together. He attended clown school with his dad when he was a 3rd grade teacher at University School of Milwaukee. Many people know Mike as Buckets the Clown, and he loves making balloon animals for students on their birthdays and other special occasions. He is passionate about bringing joy, engagement, kindness, and care to school every day. Mike is honored to call himself an educator, and he looks forward to sharing stories that have shaped him and his philosophy of education.